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A. Холостяк #25 Matt James

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Старый 04.02.2021, 02:54   #176
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The Red Team wins (thanks to MJ), and Chris Harrison names a “Most Valuable Bride” from the Gold Team to join them in the evening. You guys knew I’d be making a .GIF of the Red Team CHEERING at hearing Mari would be joining them in the evening…
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Старый 04.02.2021, 03:12   #177
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In the evening, we get another hint that Victoria is simply being an airtime ham, in addition to a tiny peek behind the curtain (her revealing that, while they ran around in sleeveless gowns, it was freezing cold), both rolled into one .GIF…

This interjection and its timing strike me as just saying something negative for the sake of it. It just doesn’t make any sense that, while Matt is giving a speech ABOUT WHAT GREAT SPORTS THEY ARE, she’d feel the need to shout, “Freezing!” Now, if this were an isolated incident, I’d just assume Victoria has abysmal social skills. But, as you’re probably noticing with this recap, it’s just one of so many examples of conspicuously “off” behavior.
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Старый 04.02.2021, 03:26   #178
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There two notable conversations on this date, with each Jessenia and Lauren, but this snippet from Lauren’s 1-on-1, about their shared faith, had me making a .GIF…

I really appreciated this perspective as it ties into the importance of looking for what you’re actually looking for. If what you’re looking for is someone who feels the same way as you do about religion, then it’s a must that you prioritize it. (It sounds silly to put in writing, but truly, a lot of Dear Shandy questions we receive are along these lines.) I do think a lot of people sort of temper who they are and what their beliefs are in order to attract a broader audience, so I love how Matt mentioned this, especially in the context of making a change in how he approaches this.

As for what Matt’s saying above, about the preconceived notions, I think there’s definitely some truth to that, certainly depending on the region. (In my case, depending on the setting, I have felt uncomfortable sharing that I am NOT religious for the very same reason—it has actually taken me years to become more comfortable sharing my views on religion.) But above all, what I really appreciated about this conversation was the fact that it was just that—a conversation.

I wasn’t surprised to see a lot of opposing opinions to my thoughts Matt’s group prayer last week. (Some of you said you felt it was a cultural “huddle” of sorts, given where he’s from and his history as a football player, which I think hits the nail on the head. I never said I felt it was done with any malice and I maintain that opinion, but nonetheless, it could be alienating for some. They are not mutually exclusive.) The above, however, stood out to me as the right way to go about expressing your faith to potential partners, in a conversation where the point is to learn about one another. THIS is what I was missing with that group prayer.
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Старый 04.02.2021, 03:41   #179
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Lauren, 29
Corporate Attorney, Miami, Florida

Lauren is a Florida girl through and through! She is a successful corporate lawyer who recently had her law reviews published. In Lauren's free time, she enjoys fashion, going to the beach, working out and spending time with her girlfriends in their book club. Lauren has everything going for her, but now she wants someone to share in her many successes! She is looking for someone who is genuine and authentic. She needs to feel that the man she is with truly has her back in any situation thrown their way. Lauren is hoping for a family of her own one day, so she needs a mature family man that is on the same page. Not wanting to have kids is a major deal breaker for Lauren. She says that none of the guys she has dated in the past have truly been her best friend, and she's hoping to change that here with Matt.

- Lauren is terrified of lizards and frogs.
- Lauren lives for the Christmas season.
- Lauren loves 2000s hip-hop.
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Старый 04.02.2021, 05:56   #180
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BRI’S 1-ON-1 pics

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Старый 04.02.2021, 05:59   #181
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:01   #182
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:03   #183
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:04   #184
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:06   #185
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:07   #186
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:08   #187
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:09   #188
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:13   #189
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“The only thing that was ever wrong with me was my belief that something was wrong with me.” (c)
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:14   #190
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“The only thing that was ever wrong with me was my belief that something was wrong with me.” (c)
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:14   #191
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:17   #192
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“The only thing that was ever wrong with me was my belief that something was wrong with me.” (c)
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:33   #193
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SARAH’S 1-ON-1

Let me get this out of the way: I REALLY like Sarah. (Confession: her Intro video last week made me tear up.) I just find her really low-key, unassuming, and quietly confident. Of course, the show wastes no time in making her backstory with her father—namely, her sharing her backstory with her father—her major talking point. Just watch her reaction to Matt asking specifically about her dad, plus how we don’t see her initial response come out of her mouth…

I’m sure it won’t surprise you that I believe this expression was taken from a different moment. First, just visually speaking, she’s more reclined in the reaction shot (versus when she speaks about her dad)—if she did sit up, she did so pretty quickly. Second, that wide-eyed expression is one that says, “How do I talk about this?”, or “I don’t want to talk about this”, neither of which really fit her response (especially when you take into account that she speaks about her father in-depth in the evening).
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:48   #194
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I guess what I’m getting at is, The Powers That Be aren’t shying away from making it seem like Sarah’s shying away from talking about her dad and his condition.

Now watch the following scene…

And now, give it a listen, paying attention to Matt’s tone when he says “she’s slow getting started, but…” (the only thing we can see come out of his mouth)…
“I had a great time with Sarah today / but, um / I could tell that / Sarah was struggling / with something. / And / she’s slow getting started, but / I need her to be / open and vulnerable / because / I’ve already had / other women being authentic and real / and / that’s / what I’m looking for.”

Talk about a hacked up voiceover. Note how Sarah not volunteering her father’s condition—when Matt simply asked the natural question of how her father felt about her going on reality TV—is somehow twisted into her being “closed off” and not “vulnerable” enough. Sound familiar? This is the exact same language used with Ben last season. I seriously hope this show lays off on this because I don’t know if I can handle a whole other season of contestants’ “openness and vulnerability” somehow equating to how willingly (and quickly) they share deep, personal struggles and traumas.
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Старый 04.02.2021, 06:50   #195
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ROSE CEREMONY

The Rose Ceremony Cocktail Party rolls around and, again on cue, Victoria’s back at it. I have to admit I laughed at Matt’s cannot-compute blink when Victoria brings up the house drama…

Something about the above, bearing in mind Matt never had the contestant experience and its corresponding drama, and knowing how this is sure to be only the tippy top of the iceberg, cracks me up.
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Старый 05.02.2021, 20:54   #196
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Matt, taking a page out of Peter’s Bachelor handbook (which I imagine to some extent is production’s handbook), promptly pulls Marylynn aside. Her fearful question is the most blatant reminder of that power imbalance I’m always ranting about…

Marylynn handles Matt’s questioning like a CHAMP. I love how, despite her (understandable) frustration, she so clearly stated, “Well, it’s her word against mine.” She very quickly realized it wasn’t worth her breath to point fingers and get defensive. I was super impressed with her poise not only during this conversation, but especially when she politely asked to speak with Victoria afterwards. After all, most contestants in Marylynn’s position would retaliate with anger. Instead, Marylynn approached this as calmly and rationally as you could possibly hope…
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Старый 05.02.2021, 20:59   #197
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First, what stands out to me is how Victoria is SO! ANGRY! with Marylynn, yet we never actually get an ounce of information surrounding what Marylynn said or did. (She was just “mean”, something that not one other woman witnessed, nor could even envision.) Second, Marylynn is unbelievably kind and level-headed in her efforts to come to this “understanding”, despite Victoria refusing to even sit on the same sofa. What functioning adult being would behave so petulantly, to refuse to even sit on the same sofa?? You’d expect this behavior from a misbehaved toddler. Even in response to Marylynn’s efforts (above), Victoria pauses, flipping through potential responses, aiming for the least cordial option she could think of in the moment. Every action of Victoria’s has stood out to me as phony and antagonistic to the max, but this scene takes the cake. Based on this exchange alone (and the fact that every woman stood by Marylynn’s side), we know that whatever it is that Marylynn did to offend Victoria, it couldn’t have been THAT bitchy or unreasonable.

Now, it’s not so much that I think Victoria is some producer “plant”. But I’ve long felt certain contestants have mutually beneficial relationships with producers, the reality TV version of a knowing wink. My issue with Victoria is how, unlike Demi or even Corinne, she has zero charm. There is nothing appealing or entertaining or even remotely funny about her. Yet, unlike Krystal or Courtney Robertson or Tierra LiCausi, she seems to be in on it; she’s intentional in how she rubs wrong those around her. The result is really flat, contrived-feeling conflict. If I wanted to watch contestants play characters the way Victoria is, I would watch scripted reality shows.
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Старый 07.02.2021, 04:14   #198
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Marylynn, 28
Event Coordinator, Studio City, California

Marylynn needs a man who is ready to commit and not afraid to wear his heart on his sleeves. She wants a stable man who will love her unconditionally, someone who is loyal to the core and who would be a rock for her when life throws the inevitable curve ball their way. In five years, Marylynn hopes to be married with two or more rescue dogs, and living a productive, inspirational, healthy life with the support of her man by her side. She hopes to start several companies focused around promoting environmental welfare and healthy lifestyle choices, and will need her soul mate to share her goals of making the world a better place. She doesn't see herself with anyone who is lazy, introverted or someone who doesn't prioritize their heath and hygiene. She says that finding her life partner has always been a top priority and that experiencing true and undeniable love is the ultimate goal because it is something so special and unique. Will Matt be Marylynn's person, or will her search for the perfect love story continue on?

- Marylynn loves Disneyland.
- Marylynn hopes to start a nonprofit that helps the environment reduce and eventually eradicate single-use plastic.
- Marylynn grew up surfing, but she is terrified of sharks!
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Старый 10.02.2021, 07:10   #199
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Finally, heading into the Rose Ceremony, there’s an ITM of Kit’s that stood out to me as giving a true taste of the contestant experience…

This is insanely accurate. After all, it’s not like contestants necessarily expect things to go their way—they know it will be competitive—but they expect at least a fair shot. I personally suspect that, with Victoria-gate (and similar situations across other seasons), The Powers That Be even keep Matt (and other leads) in the ITM room longer than they otherwise might, simply to rile up and exhaust the women even more than they were to begin with.
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Старый 10.02.2021, 07:24   #200
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PREDICTIONS

1. Bri, 24:

Bri continues to be the season’s woman to watch. She’s the perfect combination of stunningly beautiful, down-to-earth, and just seems like a girl you’d want to be friends with. She got the season’s first 1-on-1 date where she and Matt were able to laugh hysterically, have hot make out seshes, and bond on a serious level about their relationships with their fathers and what that looked like growing up. I love her lack of affect—she seems 100% herself, yet without being too comfortable in that environment either. I really like Bri, and it would seem Matt does, too.
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